Anxiety fills THE AZN ROOM

Look, it’s us!

Trina and I made it into the Verge’s e-blast! #GrabTheGuide and come see us on September 15 and 16!

I’ve got two weekends left to prepare for the Verge Center for the Arts’ Studio Art Tour. I got a God Girl altar project with lanterns and tiles, and also that project about idealizing the relationship among my parents and I.

The latter project – not so hot. I’ve got like 2 pieces done lol Luckily, we’ll also be showing some larger scale older work. If y’all remember Generalizasian, get ready for a blast from the past.

Of the former project, I have completed 67 lanterns – just 3 more to go. The lanterns are covered in images of the holy trio – God Girl, Skeleton Space Man, and Sleep Walker – along with epic biblical messages, noodles (obviously), the burning pizza, and space to think about it all.  You’ll have to bump into the lanterns in order to get to your destination: the altar to God Girl, where you can say a prayer and make a “donation” to the church of God Girl.

Who is God Girl?

God Girl is an all-powerful disembodied aZn God… Girl. She’s got golden skin, flushed cheeks, strange blue/green almond eyes, red lips, and a classic A-line bowl cut.

She is Skeleton Space Man and Skeleton Space Man is her. Skeleton Space Man (SSM) is a trickster, a deviant, a hooligan, a fun and dangerous fellow. What can’t he do? What won’t he do? Not many know about SSM’s tricks or his relation to God Girl.

And then there’s Sleep Walker. A poor lost soul, some kid who passed away in comatose. His parents were devout believers in the aZn faith. They tried to steer their son to the righteous path, but one day he just collapsed, and later passed. They were devastated, of course. Why would God Girl do this to them? What had they done wrong? Had their son brought this upon himself and thus them? Is She such a vengeful God? But surely God Girl took him for a reason. Have faith. Trust in God Girl. Believe that She took Our Son away for the Greater Good™. He is in a better place now, Our Son in aZn Heaven.

Sleep Walker’s parents may be glorified or horrified to know that their son died so he could join God Girl and SSM in aZn Heaven. God Girl saw that Sleep Walker wasn’t a believer, and she was like whatever about it. But SSM saw God Girl seeing that Sleep Walker wasn’t a believer, so he did something about it. He took his own Righteous Path™ and brought Sleep Walker to their heavenly realm so he would believe.

When Sleep Walker arrived, he was like the opposite of like whatever about it. Why was he there? Why was he not here anymore? What was his purpose now? Who had the right to do this to him?

But Sleep Walker was where he was, where he will always be, and where he always has been (time and existence work differently in aZn Heaven). Now he was part of the family, whether he believed it or not. His Purpose™ now was to serve God Girl and SSM as a bridge to the mortal realm. Before, God Girl and SSM could only really watch and tinker around occasionally if they really wanted to. But now it was so much easier for SSMboth of them to actively participate and alter the world they watched. Like, if they liked plain old television before, this was really HD, even 3D or VR sort of stuff! What a time to be God!

Sleep Walker’s unique situation allowed him to possess mortals, making them act a certain way, guiding them forcefully and unbeknownst to them towards different decisions. What fun!

What does it all mean?

My God Girl series started as a naturally point on the path from Generalizasian (angry about stereotypes) and Frustrasian (depressed about stereotypes) to being proud of who I am at whatever point in time, to taking hold of my own agency, to live my life without needing to make everything about race and gender (ya but you’re right, it’s still totally about those and more). God Girl also developed as a response to growing up Christian, then having a WTF moment (I’m agnostic), but still having a super devout parent.

Granted, I have friends who are Christian and it doesn’t bother me (I mean, I still have to read more than a children’s Bible, but objectively so far to me the stories are actually just bad – like, Moses had to convince God not to kill everyone, and then He killed everyone and wouldn’t let Moses into the promised land???). But when you have a relationship with someone who feels the need to shove Christianity in your face all the time, it’s just kind of awkward. And I want other people to feel that way, too lol though I know lots of you already feel me the way people in your life wish you felt the spirit of Christ amiiiiriiiite?

tl;dr – God Girl is just a way for me to work through my relationship with my mum and her relationship with God. 

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This is not an art update. (well actually…)

Goodbye Forever

PPAC gave me a great farewell on Friday by having meat cake catered, aka meatloaf that I love from Selland’s. They endured my Karaoke list on Spotify, which includes hits like All Star by ShreSmash Mouth, Photograph by Nickelback, In the End by Linkin Park, Complicated by Avril Lavigne, etc. They also let me show them several memes on YouTube, including Noot Noot, Shrek, and Eminem’s Mom’s Spaghetti.

After packing up and heading home, I headed straight to Trina’s to grab Bon Chon, aka delicious props for of the shots in our #aZnroom music video. Lots of fun filming.


Today I finally got off my ass and went to Zumba in the morning, then headed out to host an Artsy Fartsy reunion among old art classmates.

ICYMI: Back in college, I organized several Artsy Fartsy get-togethers, but the flyer for one of them had my Nubbinz character farting, which one of the Art Department administrators did not like. I had posted the flyer to the Art Department website (it made sense because it was an event for art students?), but then it got taken down, I was banned from the page, and then promptly received a notification from the chair of the department telling me that my post was vulgar and distracted from the real purpose of the Facebook page. This seems to happen to me pretty frequently for some reason. Anyway, I then launched war in the form of rogue art exhibits. There was a pizza art exhibit on the hallway cork boards and a whole lot of butts going around. One of my professors then decided to take up half of a much-needed pre-finals review session to berate me in front of the class lol.

Anyway, it was refreshing to meet up with my old classmates and see how they’re doing. Here’s our group photo!

THEN I got home and received a package my now former coworkers sent as a going-away gift: Shrek slippers. THE BEST. Ogrewhelmed with gratitude.

Annnnnddd then I spent the rest of the day cleaning instead of doing art, so I’m extremely behind in my 100 drawings wamp wamp. Here’s the 3 out of 5 I’ve done so far lol:

SJAM is my JAM

Last week I got a chance to check out the new exhibits at the San Jose Art Museum, which I love so obviously you should go to it immediately. Below is a sketch I made in their interactive portion of the Raimonds Staprans exhibit. But my favorite exhibit was actually The House Imaginary, which explored definitions of what a house is / is not. I’m terrible at documenting my favorite pieces, but there was one made of fabric that looked like the ghost of a large traditional Korean archway. It referred to how in Korea they’ll tear down really old, historic architecture and replace it with modern buildings. There was a window cast from when an artist cast the entire interior of an old, decrepit house. And there were some prints of the room layouts in different homes another artist previously lived in. Really fascinating work on displacement, memory, etc. Go see it while you can! The exhibit runs until August!